Things I do because I'm a Moron

Sorry Col. I totally copied your series title. Ok? Let me begin by premising that these are completely true things I have done with little to no exaggeration because I may not recall all of the details.

It all begins with this little ditty: That stage of sleep when you are between asleep and awake. Mmmkay? In said stage I have thought these things were either true or I had these abilities.

1. I have thought I have a control on time. That I can make it freeze so I can get that extra hour of sleep. It's been what seems like hours of sleep from 1:30 AM until 2:30 AM. Only one hour, but in my mind it's been like 8. I start snickering about the ability. And I even remember saying a few times, "Time! Stop!"

2. I've had the greatest ideas in the universe. And I truly believe them. A couple of examples: The best tasting pork rind (notice the oxymoron) is chocolate/peanut butter. I don't even care for Pork Rinds that much or even Chocolate/PB. Another one, a great tasting new Coke is Pepsi flavored Coke and it wouldn't be called Pepsi. And three, (this one occurred on Men's Advance) Duck, Duck, Goose makes a great game for an all-night solo game. Sadly, no one else in the room played along.

3. I have actually texted people texts like the following, "Hey wquaktfs op my himmie? Wanna grab a Cloke? Whafdmyt???" And even carried on whole conversations with a friend on the phone! Don't recall why I called her. I just did and proceeded to talk about what else? How to make the best Cherry flavored Coke.

Well those are some of the ones that come to mind. I could list some of my dreams but we all have crazy weird dreams. I suppose I could post the one from last night because it's pretty cool.

I was on a college campus tour. And the whole college was an steel foundry built in one dormitory. About halfway through the tour, there were some alien invaders. But not just any evil aliens. But the worst . . . Romulans. So we had to fight our way out of the foundry to get to the ships (I was wrestling with pillows and threw a couple punched some and flipped one over my head). When we got to the ship I was the captain and there was no Coke in the food replicators. And then I woke up. I'm not crazy or obsessed with Coke at all. hahaha